Posts Tagged ‘ halloween ’

Bob, pt. 3

Bob, pt. 1

Bob, pt. 2

Shirley looked shocked, as if she had just realized the truth in her words. She gasped, then dropped her head into her hands. Her shoulders began to shake.

Bob stood perplexed.

First, this woman had bludgeoned him with a fire hydrant, then told him humanity was dead, and now she was crying.

Bob could cope with the first two ridiculous realities, but had no idea what to do with a crying female.

Awkwardly, Bob patted Shirley’s shoulder, but she shook him off.

Sniffing, she stood and tied her hair back from her face.

“We’re humanity’s last chance for survival,” she said, squaring her shoulders, “It’s our responsibility to stay alive.” She began dragging the desk toward the front door again.

“Wait,” Bob finally squeaked, “I’m still stuck on the whole ‘everyone is dead’ concept.”

“I’ll explain later,” Shirley snapped, “Just help me barricade the doors already. We probably don’t have much time. They aren’t too clever, but I think they can smell.”

They pushed one desk in front of the doors, and Shirley marched briskly back toward the first office.

Bob followed, tripping on a shoelace. “What’s They?”

Shirley laughed ruefully, “I only wish I knew. As far as I can tell, they kill people without really killing them.” She hefted a second file cabinet on top of the desk, effectively blocking the doors.

“Like zombies?” Bob said skeptically, “Really, Shirley? Are you sure you’re not hungover or I’m dreaming or it’s a holiday and everyone forgot?”

Annoyed, Shirley started to answer, but a sound outside cut her off.

A small voice called in an accent Bob didn’t recognize.

“Hello? Can I come in? I’m so hungry…”




Bob, pt. 2

Bob, pt. 1

Shirley was a heavy-set, twenty-something woman who had always seemed to Bob to be impossibly practical. She always worked by the book and walked at a pace no faster then necessary.

It caught Bob by surprise to see her dodging behind bushes, and skirting widely around his car as she crept toward the office building.

He lost sight of her when she reached the doors, and he ran to the stairs, thrilled to see another human.

“At least I’m not the only person left on earth!” Bob tried to laugh, but a frown creased his face.

The electricity was still out, so Bob opted to take the stairs down all six stories.

“Shirley?” he stopped at each floor, calling the scared receptionist’s name. Each time he got no response, so he continued his descent.

Finally, Bob reached the ground floor. “Shirley?” he called, “It’s Bob, from the office upstairs from you. Are you here?”

A startling blow hit Bob from behind, and he fell to his hands and knees, stunned and winded.

“Are you alive or are you dead?” Shirley was standing over Bob brandishing the fire extinguisher with which she had struck him in the back.

“What kind of question is that?” Bob gasped, “Of course I’m alive!”

Shirley looked keenly into Bob’s eyes, squinting. Bob remembered that she usually wore glasses.

Time seemed to slow as she scrutinized him, but finally Shirley lowered her fire extinguisher.

“Bob. How did you get here?” She moved back toward the storage closet where she had been hiding, “We have to start barricading the doors.”

“I drove, obviously,” Bob stood, wincing. “Why are you acting so strange? And where is everyone? You’re the only other person I’ve seen all day.”

Shirley stopped dragging a desk toward the doors and looked at him, her face twisting slightly, “Bob, I can’t believe I have to tell you this.” She dropped to a sitting position.

“They’re all dead.”



Bob, pt. 1

So I’m discontent with how brief my post from yesterday was, so I’m writing again. I’m bringing a change of pace this time– this little story I wrote this morning at work. I had no customers for like an hour and a half, so I wrote this on the back of the chore list. Enjoy!


Once upon a time, there was a dude named Bob. Everyone assumed his real name was Robert, but there it was on his birth certificate– Bob.

Well, one day, Bob was driving to work when he noticed something strange. He was the only car on the road, and even though it was getting close to nine AM, he hadn’t seen another human– not in his neighborhood, nor through town, nor driving.

“I wonder what’s going on?” he mused to himself, parking at his office building. “I wonder if it’s a holiday and I forgot.”

He walked up to the building’s front doors and was surprised to find them slightly open.

“Curiouser and curiouser,” he said, and snorted at himself for the quote.  He looked around the deserted first floor, and continued, “This surely isn’t Wonderland.”

Bob rode the elevator up the vacant building to his office, and found it devoid of life.

He chuckled to himself, “I must be the only good employee.” He went to his cubicle and booted his computer, “I’d best check to make sure there aren’t any important emails I’ve missed that explain this nonsense.”

As his computer came to life, Bob found that the Internet wasn’t functioning. He found and rebooted the modem to no avail.

Frustrated, Bob picked up the phone to call support, only to find the line dead. Bob checked every phone in the office, then every phone in the building.

Just as he picked up and threw down the last phone on the top floor, the power suddenly went out.

Scared, Bob rifled through his briefcase for his cell phone. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of this before,” he grumbled, but no cell phone was to be found, and Bob realized that it was still sitting peacefully on his nightstand, no doubt overheating from charging for too long.

Angry and confused, Bob climbed the last set of stairs to the roof. He kicked some stray pebbles and bottle caps at the pigeons, who flew away in a huff.

He sighed and leaned resignedly against the wall, staring out over the city without seeing.

Bob didn’t know how long he had been standing there when a movement in the parking lot caught his eye.

It was Shirley, the receptionist from the office downstairs. But the way she was moving– something seemed wrong to Bob…



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